The six rules

The wine business sounds very glamorous, but it is riddled with pitfalls. Industry tastings can be exhausting, but there is a sense of order that keeps them from getting really out of control. The same goes for winemaker dinners. Company parties on the other hand, can be life threatening. Typically at these events, several great bottles of wine are thrown down on the table and everyone scrambles to get a taste. No drinking related issues would prbably arrise if the number of bottles were limited to, say, one per person. In reality, however, the ratio is closer to 2 bottles per. I always feel bad for the new hire who is confronted with all this great wine for the first time. Inevitably, these rookies dive right in and often they have to be pulled out just before drowning. Here are six rules that can help one survive a wine industry party.

1- Arrive late and leave early
It is a good idea to reduce the window of time that you are obligated to drink.

2- Drink only one half glass of Champagne

I love Champagne, but it goes down the hatch way too fast. In addition, the bubbles in Champagne speed up the transfer of alcohol into your blood stream. If, God forbid, you are talked into a second glass, immediately arrange for an ambulance to pick you up later.

3- Stick to German Riesling and red Burgundy
The lower the alcohol, the better.

4- Consume a ton of water
I always feel like I should have a drink in my hand at these functions and rotating in several glasses of water is a smart move.

5- Never go out for the post party drink

One last drink always turns into three. If you do decide to go out, make sure that you have an extra bagel in the house. Mr. Hangover will be paying a visit the next morning.

6- Find someone to ride the train with you on the way home

If you are not able to find a train buddy, you run the risk of falling asleep and ending up in a run down city with a high murder rate.

The David Bowler Wine 5th anniversity party is beging held this evening in New York City and I am going to glue these rules to my forehead.